Genuine

Tonight the phone has been ringing off the hook.  One of my favorite young friends with questions.  One of my best friends with chat.  My Dad and step-mother with plans for an upcoming visit - which must include golf, I'm told.  Text messages from my brother and sister about plans for the weekend.  And a call from an old college friend with whom I'm recently reconnected.  She and her son will join us to kayak on Sunday.  Then on line facebook and twitter messages.

What I love is that all these people are genuinely connecting to do fun things.  There is life out there.  There is life right here.  

I'm ready for laughter.  I'm ready for genuine spirits seeking the best the things in life.

Have I said "genuine" enough?  

1. Actually possessing the alleged or apparent attribute or character: genuine leather.

2. Not spurious or counterfeit; authentic. See Synonyms at authentic.

3.

a. Honestly felt or experienced: genuine devotion.

b. Actual; real: a genuine dilemma.

4. Free from hypocrisy or dishonesty; sincere.

5. Being of pure or original stock: a genuine Hawaiian.

Ok, we all have some agenda.  But, you know what?  Some have much more agenda than others.  Let's have some good, old fashioned connections.  Honest - actual - real - free from hypocrisy or dishonesty.  That's not so hard.  Certainly not for good hearted people.

No rain - no rainbows

It's raining - a good soaking rain.  Most of us grumble about it.  Today I'm happy because it'll help my garden grow.  And I love the saying "No rain, no rainbows".

Most of us go through rainy times in our lives.  Sometimes we experience outright storms.  We are impatient to get through them.  They are troublesome and seem to keep us from what we'd rather be experiencing but it's part of  life.  There will be storms.  Hopefully fewer as we learn not to call them on.  But there will be storms.

When I was young I liked running out in the middle of the pouring summer rain - even with thunder and lightning.  Maybe one day this summer I should do that for the fun of it.  But more and more, I look for a calm spot to patiently wait it out.  I'm the one you'll see pull my car to the side of the road when the blinding rain is too much for the windshield wipers.  

I'll wait out the storm and look for the rainbow on the other side.  I'll search the garden later with expectation of spouting seeds.

And so it is that I remind myself to value to the rain and storms of life.  There will be rainbows.  Keep planting to seeds between the rains with expectation of sprouts and a harvest.

Perception

Some people say I think too much but I'd rather think too much than too little.  Some people say I'm kind of quiet, but I remember a saying "if you have nothing to say, never say it out loud."  So, I think and I write.  Maybe writing is like thinking out loud.  

Tonight I'm thinking about perceptions.  Years ago I did communication workshops about it.  I'd start the workshop showing a handful of pictures from ads and magazine stories minus the text that went with them.  Two of the images were perceived incorrectly by every workshop attendee.  The one was a close up of a young woman's face.  Her hair was wet and she was holding an ice cube to her bottom lip.  The other showed two black children cuddled together in a living room with a shadow of a man in the doorway which led to the kitchen.

Now, these workshops were held for volunteers who were preparing to work hotlines, women shelters, and other crisis intervention programs.  So, I admit that they were a bit set up to seek trouble.  But, that was my point.  Even when we see it with our own eyes, it may not be what we believe it to be.

The woman with the wet hair and ice cube was in a health magazine story about ways to keep your lips healthy.  Most believed she had been beaten.

The story with the black children was about Habitat for Humanity and the shadowy figure was their dad who was making their dreams come true.  Most thought the children were in danger.

We can be so very wrong about what we are seeing if we do not have all the "text" to go with the story.  

It's the text and the full context that makes all the difference.

And so it is with our perceptions of ourselves.  The greater context of our existence provides the greater truth.  If we isolate ourselves, find ourselves in great conflict with outer voices, or otherwise discover that our self perception and our external audiences perception is different, we are probably missing the truth.  

Actions speak loudest

It's sometimes difficult to determine the truth in others.  It's sometimes difficult to find the truth within ourselves.  When our words and our actions conflict, there's something wrong.  It's the simplest measure, but we often ignore it.  Actions speak louder than words and we need to focus on the actions.  It is the truest measure of truth in others and within ourselves.

I keep thinking about a woman who claims to have had a lifelong dream and expresses deep passion for a certain place.  But her actions display the complete opposite.  Saying something is true does not make it so.  

I know when my actions don't match my words I have all kinds of reasons.  Someone or something is preventing me from putting my words into action.  Usually, somewhere in the middle I'll say it just isn't that easy.  In place of action, the woman above will say "I'm working on it."  The action is no more than our lips moving.

And then there's what the lips are saying.  Here are some good ones.  "And I can prove it."  But no proof comes.  "He/she won't let me."  Huh?  "I'm afraid of what he/she might do."  So?

For me, in addition to being thankful and happy, I know I need to keep striving for my words and actions to match.  And I want the balance to be more action and less talk.

Opportunity perhaps?

I received a letter today from a distant relative who is "praying for me" and included a tract about the dreaded homosexual lifestyle.  How do I turn this into a thankful thing?  These are the challenges - opportunities - that will surely help me grow.

I decided to look up lifestyle - "habits, attitudes, tastes, moral standards, economic level, etc., that together constitute the mode of living of an individual or group."

Do hetersexuals have the same habits, attitudes, tastes, moral standards and economic levels?

Thankful every day!

I wake up every morning thankful.  I go to sleep every night thankful.  There are plenty of things that could occupy my mind for which I am not thankful but I've made a conscious effort these past months to find and live out my own joy.  Now that I'm getting the hang of it, it's great fun.  And it is the one thing no one can steal from me.  

The more thankful I am each moment, the more things there seem to be to be thankful about.  Now how does that happen?  I have the same job.  I have the same boss.  I live in the same place.  I have pretty much the same looming issues - some of them quite daunting with no real solution in sight.  The simple answer I can give is that I decided to be happy and be happy doing the things I love.

So I focus on all the great things in my life - all the great people in my life - all the interesting projects at work - all the places I get to see.  I'm not ignoring or forgetting about the issues - just focusing on what can be done and being patient knowing things will get done and will be solved with the right attitude.

As a result, I'm finding everything more enjoyable.  Today, I made two new friends in our HR department as we worked on a project.  We had a great time as we got the work done.  At lunch we chatted away about cool things we find in common.

Frustrations that would have weighed me down on another project, were easily overcome in another meeting.  And I enjoyed the process.

Over the weekend with people from all walks of life, I talked with people and learned wonderful things about their philosophies.  We exchanged phone numbers and emails.  And unlike my normal previous self, I will follow up with them.

I'm sure I will have down days and still have moments of feeling overwhelmed.  But I am determined to wake up each day thankful.  I am determined to end each day thankful.  I give you permission to remind me to be so.

Linda goes to camp

Last month while flying here and there, I read an article about the growing number of adult camping excursions.  Those of us who went to camp as youngsters, are loving the idea of going to camp again.  Meanwhile, my brother told me about the Butler Outdoor Club's annual Extravaganza at Breakneck campground near McConnell's Mill.  I didn't realize it then, but I signed up for camp.

This is the Outdoor club's 13th year of holding this event and it is amazing.  Go to butleroutdoorclub.com to see the list of events from which to choose.  There's mountain biking at various levels, hiking in strenuous and not strenuous settings, rock climbing, history excursions, bird watching, kayaking, sailing and so much more.  In addition to all the activities, there are the "camp" experiences of joint meals, group campfires, and nightly programs.  It's all family oriented and family friendly - even dogs are welcome at many of the activities.  I didn't take my Molly mutt this time because I chose several events that were not dog friendly.  Next year, I will choose dog friendly events because she would have loved it and I missed her.

Breakneck campground is a perfect spot for this type of event.  They have a beautiful location with a nice big "dining hall", shower building, cabins, shelters, and plenty of campsites.  It's a campground geared to outdoor people - no pool hall or game room - a safe space, ready firewood, and great proximity to lots of outdoor recreation.

Attendees of all ages - little ones to 80 somethings - were happily involved - all gathered to experience the outdoors in their own way.  And the Butler Outdoor group worked diligently to provide the best atmosphere possible for all.  I can only imagine the work that goes into organizing an event like this.  Try gathering 30 family members for a picnic and you may get an idea.  Take those 30 people on an excursion together - multiply that times 10 excursions going on at once in opposite directions and....  These folks, I'm certain, could actually herd cats.

My hat is off!  I had a wonderful time and I would encourage everyone to check out the Butler Outdoor Club.  Even bigger than that - I encourage you to get outdoors in Western PA.  Perhaps in my next blog, I can share some of the fun places I saw this past weekend.  Right now, I need a shower and a bed.