Sunday, September 16, 2012


What I would like to see more in the world around us is diplomacy.  The communication skills required to act toward resolution or prevention of conflict are the most important skills anyone can possess.  Those skills are tact, empathy, careful persuasion, honesty, credibility and active listening - just to name a few.
We need those skills in our personal relationships.  We need those skills in our community.  We need those skills in our world.
If we are surrounded by family and friends who are strong in those skills, it has a profound effect on our lives.  There aren't enough people who are able and willing to step into a situation with diplomatic intent.  And even less people who are willing to listen to diplomatic reasoning.
I guess it's just human nature to want total support and sympathy for our side of a conflict.  We want someone to justify our hurt.  At that moment we are most vulnerable to influence toward actions based on our hurt.  All too often the person beside us fans the flames.
I want a diplomat beside me in those times.  I want a diplomat on the other side as well.  If you have not experienced a situation where diplomatic friends help resolve a conflict, you are not as lucky as I.  It changes more than just that one particular moment.
Diplomatic friends carefully step up and say - "Hey - we care about you both and this hurts all of us.  Let's get this worked out."  They are focused on the bigger picture and the interconnected relationships. 
It's very effective because the next time there is potential conflict, you think about more than yourself.  You see the faces of the people who care about you and remember the pain your conflicts cause them.
If instead, you are surrounded by people who do nothing when you are in pain or encourage actions that raise the level of conflict, you need new friends.
Give me a diplomat.  I want to develop those kinds of skills.  If we could all develop those skills, there would be less divorce, less need of courts, and less war.  Wouldn't that be nice!

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