Sunday, November 29, 2009

Sister Girlfriends!

I grew up with four sisters - all with wonderfully diverse personalities.  At one point, all five of us shared the same room!  You can imagine how that was.  Sometimes we fought one another - even actual knock down, drag out fights.  We cried together.  We told one another our secrets.  We schemed together.  Through it all, we loved each other and love each other still.
We have gone too long of times without seeing or talking to one another.  We have had major differences.  But if one of my sisters calls needing me, I will drop the world to be there for her.  Our tenderness with one another has grown.  We say 'I love you' a lot more and a lot easier.
These sisters I speak of are not blood sisters.  They are step-sisters.  But we grew up together and, we have chosen each other.  We remain full sisters by choice.  Distance scatters us and we cannot see one another as often as we should, but they are mine.
A wonderful group of women have emerged around me this year.  Strong sisters!  As with my other sisters, I am the sole lesbian.  But I do believe, every strong woman is a lesbian at some level.  Forgive the labels.  Women identified women!  The connections between us vary.  It is not necessarily sexual but it is deeply affectionate.  To me, it is a spiritual connection.
I am thankful for it.  I am thankful for all my sisters.
Generally, I find, that these strong women - if attached to men - are attached to some pretty awesome men who are confident and comfortable in their relationships.  As a primarily 'woman identified woman' on most all levels, this has been interesting for me to learn.  Some pretty awesome men have helped me to understand it.  One is my bother - who grew up in a whole house full of sisters.  And two pretty awesome guys I work with have had a lot to say.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Today and Now

There's much to be said about living in the moment.  This day - what lies right before us - can be as magical and wonderful as we allow it to be.  We clutter our hearts and minds with fears.  Fears based on the past.  Fears based on what might or should be in the future.  Fears imposed upon us by others.
I recall an old quote that went something like this;  "Yesterday is gone, forget about it.  Tomorrow has not come, don't worry about it.  Today is here, live it."
Of course, that is cliche and terribly black and white, but the central truth is that if yesterday and tomorrow are holding you back from today, you aren't really living.  We need to remember the mistakes of yesterday so we don't repeat them.  We need to remember that mistakes we make today are likely to hold consequences tomorrow.  But, if this day - this moment - we act with a true heart, deep respect, love and kindness, we can live without fear.  
Our lives ripple across many others.  Sometimes those surrounding us are creating waves against us and even threaten to drown us.  Most often, the churning is based in fear.  Fear, not hate, is the opposite of love.